Thursday, November 20, 2008

great week

I'm sitting here at home as the snow falls outside listening to worship music feeling whole, complete, and overfilled. What an amazing couple of weeks it's been. God has been so present in my life and using me as his vessle to reach people talk about his love that i've been lucky enough to have. It's perfect....I know coming from perfect God. It's been amazing. and I've had a few amazing experiences. For instance. yesterday I was at work talkingto my friend Jenn about our personal relationships with Christ, how we got there what happened to us to bring us close to him. How he's led us in our lives, about the people he's brought into our lives and why. It was a very indepth wonderful talk and our friend Dale came out while we were talking about it and just sat down and listened. Dale isn't a believer at all....and after about ten min. we looked down at her and she was sobbing. she told us that it is amazing to her to listen to us talk cause she doesn't believe and it gives her hope that some day she will and that someday God will be there for her too. I started to cry and I told her that Jesus loves her and he has never left her and never will. I know she's going through alot right now and she's not ready, but God is always ready and he's just waiting on the sidelines with his arms wide open just waiting for her to come to him so he can wrap her up in his arms and guide her along and to take on all the pain she has right now....by the time I said all that I was crying and she was crying, and jenn was hugging us both. God is so powerful and to be used by him to reach someone like that is something i'll never be able to explain it's unreal. It was just amazing. I used to be scared to talk about God to people who didn't believe but now out of nowhere he's given me the words to do so. To touch the people who need him the most and it's been the best thing I've ever done. It was something I'll never forget and i'll always hold close to my heart.
I just got home from having dinner with Jamelle and Michele two girls from my emmaus walk it was a wonderful much needed get together I missed them, and the three of us hold each other so accountable and the unconditional love that we have for each other is shocking since we only knew each other for four days at the retreat. but it's very real and I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. God has blessed me so greatly these past couple of years it's amazing and I just wish everyone could feel the perfectness of it like I do. God is good all the time, and all the time God is good.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Shannon tagged me

A. Attached or single? Attached
B. Best friend? Tara, Kassie, Sonya, Tabi... I am blessed with a lot of close girl friends!!
C. Cake or pie? Cake
D. Day of choice? Tuesday it's my day off
Essential item? toothbrush
F. Favorite color? Blue
G. Gummy bears or worms? Worms,
H. Home town? Crawfordsville
I. Favorite indulgence? eating
J. January or July? July
.K. Kids? someday
. Life isn’t complete without? Relationships
:)N. Number of brothers and sisters? 2.5 cause april isn't blood related
O. Oranges or Apples? Oranges
P. Phobias? Alcoholism
.Q. Quotes? God doesn't call the equipped, he equips the called
R. Reasons to smile? God
S. Season of choice? Summer
T. Tag 5 people:
U. Unknown fact about me? I am a girly girl at heart
V. Vegetable? gren beans
. Worst Habit? biting my nails
X. Xray or ultrassound? Ultrasound
Y. Your favorite food? Pasta
Z. Zodiac sign? Cancer

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

what a weekend

I worked on the Walk to Emmaus this weekend. I went on my walk a year ago so now I get to work on team when asked. It was an amazing weekend. I was so uplifted and filled. the presence of God was so evident. The faces of the pilgrims glowed they laughed a lot and I got to see a lot tears some of which were my own. Christs love and devotion for us poured out of every person on team who was there out of love for strangers cause God called us to be, and to watch these woman go through what I went through a year ago was amazing. I got to pray with the speakers before they went down to do their talks and that was something that was incredible. I made some very close friends this weekend. I was adopted....it was just as life changing as the first time. I also got to see my 2nd mom "momma G." or as shannon would know her Kathy Ganser. :) go through it this time. what a blessing to be there and get to witness her walk with Jesus. Just the whole weekend was something I really needed and can't wait to do again when i'm called to do so.
I have a good friend at work named Jarrah Lemert. she's 19 and has Lupus. Her whole life she's gotten random tumors here and there and she's been through chemo to get rid of them...well they have recently found some tumors on her brain stem. There's not much they can do for those but give her Chemo again to give her more time and slow the progression of them spreading. Jarrah is a wonderful woman who has been through more in her life than i could even imagine. Her mom died when she little from Lupus. Her little brother died as an infant from Lupus. Her dad remarried and her stepmom abused her, her entire life. She broke Jarrah's jaw when Jarrah was seven by pushing her down stairs....Her boyfriend now is not very nice to her. He just cheated on her and got some other girl pregnant. But Jarrah stays with him cause she has no where else to go she won't go back to live with her stepmom. Jarrah has been through a lot and she's still incredible sweet and full of love. For christmas her dad was going to buy her, her dream wig since she has had to shave her head from the chemo. Well her stepmom wouldn't let him cause she didn't understand why they should spend that kind of money on a person who won't be around long enough to wear it. We heard this at work and so we immediatly took up a collection to get her wig for her. it is 108.00 we collected 130.00 we ordered the wig yesterday from online, and got her a car and some hair ties and I got the honor of presenting her with the card which told her of her wig.....what an amazing feeling to be able to help someone who means so much to us. she sobbed....which ofcourse in turn made us all sob. The best part of yesterday......sunday night Pastor Vicki and I prayed for Jarrah and we asked God to give me the words to talk to her about a relationship with Christ. I got my opportunity yesterday. I told her that we had prayed for her. and that God loves her with all he has, and he just wants to wrap her up in his arms and guide her where he wants her while she's with us....and I don't know what else I said He really did provide the words...Jarrah cried and thanked me and told me that the reason she's okay with all of this is b/c she's found Jesus and he's given her peace with her terminality. if she dies tomorrow she knows where she's going.....WOW. I cried I was so relieved. I don't want to lose her....but i know someday we will....and I know she'll be in the kingdom out of pain and out of harms way....God is good all the time...
all the time God is good.

Monday, November 3, 2008

the life of a server

I hate being sick, I have felt like crap since saturday. and they sent me home after my first shift today. Thats okay though b/c I was expoing tonight not serving so i'm not missing out on any money right now. I've come to the conclusion that serving is the easiest job i've ever had when we are slow but the hardest when we are busy. When we are slow it consists of us sitting around talking, not doing much and goofing off...but when we are busy it's a confusion of mulittasking, people pleasing, and rushing around. I can fill someone's drink, take and order, close someone out and place an order at the same time...I can close out three tables while i'm greeting two. sometimes when I just sit back and think about my job when we are really busy I"m shocked that I can even do it. People don't realize how hard it really is to be a server. To be nice to everyone all the time regardless of how they are being treated or whats going on in their personal life. I have to keep a smile on my face and be at a guests beccon call regardless of whether they are going to tip me 10% or 20%. I have to claim ten percent of my sales on every table even if they don't leave it. and I only get paid 2.13 and hour. So when I have a table who racks up a bill of 50 bucks, then only leaves me four. I'm still claiming I made 5 dollars on that table so I"m actually paying a dollar to have wait on them. People don't realize that. I make more money at my job than I have anywhere else....but that doesn't make up for the people who have no regard for the people who are taking care of them when they go out. Those people don't realize that they are hindering many woman from taking care of their children or paying their bills. it's stupid.
I'm not going to see matthew at all this week and It really sucks but i'm also so sick that I have no desire to do anything but lay around and sleep and hopefully kick this cold before I go on the retreat thursday. I meant to take this weekend for myself to get back in touch and relax. I've been so stressed and bitchy lately. but then I got sick and I spent the whole weekend cranky, coughing, and exhausted.
I'm tired of the election stuff. I don't trust anyone to run the country anymore. I never know what to believe and which person isn't just saying stuff to get my vote. I"m not voting. I don't like either of my choices. I think Mccain is just going to be another Bush and thats not gonna help the economy any, and I think Obama might be able to help the economy but I think he's going to try to make to many changes and things are going to blow up in his face....I just don't know what to think. It's actually kinda scary to me. I'm finally to that age where I care about my country and what happens to it. I care about the economy and where my money is going and I'm not sure either of the canadites are going to do whats best for the the country. I think i'll just move to fiji or something. okay I'm just bitching on here today.....I seem to be in a negative mood...that might have something to do with the fact that I can't breath and that snot is dripping out of my nose....so it's back to the couch for me.

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About Me

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I'm 28 and I live in a tiny lake town that I love. I have the most amazing friends in the world and a fantastic family. I love my job and have made more money serving than any other more "respectable" job I've ever had.